Wednesday, August 22, 2007

Slime-Snake-Monkey-People!

Wow. This is too cool to pass up. Someone named Robert Bowie Johnson has a new book called Noah in Ancient Greek Art. His books are about how ancient Greek art actually depicts Bible stories - not Greek mythology - and so the Bible stories must be true. I think I can pretty much guess at the entire bibliography for this book:

An article by Dr. Henry Morris, famous young earth creationist and founder of the Institute for Creation Research who's degree is in hydraulic engineering. (Should it surprise you that he has no education in biology, geology or any other field related to what he wrote about? No, because he is a YEC! What do you expect?)

Genesis 1:1 - Revelation 22:21 because this is the most up-to-date and accurate writing we have on art history - as well as biology, physics, music, teen dating and ethics.

Dr. Bronner (It's good to have a couple of doctors on the list - and, I do love the soap.)

An article from Parade Magazine (You need to have an article from a peer-reviewed journal in there too.)

Oh yeah. Another recommendation for this author is that his last book "has been translated into French and Greek." To me that sounds like when a shitty sit-com in syndication announces that it is available in Spanish during the opening credits. Impressive.

Here's the best part of the press release though:

"To shock the Darwinists out of their denial of the overwhelming evidence in Greek art for the reality of Genesis events, the author urges Creationists to refer to evolutionists as what they imagine they are—'Slime-Snake-Monkey-People.'"
I guess I have to claim to be a slime-snake-monkey-person, since I am not too sure that Athena was actually Ham (Noah's son)'s wife.

3 comments:

j-bone said...

Damn it. PZ beat me to this. Oh, well.

That One Girl... said...

"Slime-Snake-Monkey-People" rolls off the tongue better than "Mutants", but, apparently, they are the same.

garth2 said...

here's the email response i got from mr. johnson:

Hi Garth. Good to hear a different point of view. I enjoy your sense of humor, too. I saw the face of the Virgin Mary on a sausage cake this morning! Wanna buy it?

I get my info for the most part from Slime-Snake-Monkey-Journalists (SSMJs). Below are three paragraphs from Section IV of my NOAH IN ANCIENT GREEK ART:

Now let’s go to a March 17, 2005 Washington Post article by SSMJ Rick Weiss entitled, “Human X Chromosome Coded,” with the sub-headline, “Sequence Confirms How Sex Evolved and Explains Some Male-Female Differences.” Despite the promising sub-headline, Weiss presented no evidence at all confirming how “sex as we know it” evolved—just these two utterly speculative sentences:

It happened about 300 million years ago, long before the first mammals. A conventional chromosome in a forebear of humans—probably a reptile of some sort—apparently underwent a mutation that allowed it to direct the development of the sperm-producing testes.

Lucky for us that this very special “probably a reptile of some sort” didn’t get hit by a comet or choke to death on a catfish before its magical mutation; otherwise, today we wouldn’t be enjoying “sex as we know it.”

Weiss got his story from Nature Magazine. Am I wrong to assume that the “reptile” was some kind of snake?

If “primordial soup” isn’t slime, what is it?

Am I on a little firmer footing when I refer to you as a mutant?

Bob
www.theparthenoncode.com


-----Original Message-----
From: gh [mailto:garth2@babyfight.com]
Sent: Tuesday, August 21, 2007 12:02 PM
To: RBowieJ@comcast.net
Subject: Innaccuracy

Dear Sir:
No one claims a snake was in human evolutionary lineage, or any
monkey, except perhaps as a very general term for a small primate.
Please research before feebly attempting to come up with non-
insulting insults. Maybe "slime-small primate-protohominid-people"
would be better, though even "slime" is a bit misleading.
Not as misleading as lying to people about science and "the
afterlife", however. I suppose you are used to it. I hope you have
fun finding what you're certain is already there in Greek art, or
ceiling tiles, or a pancake at the local IHOP.

Yours,
Garth

(my response to him asking me if he was on better ground, or whatever, was "No. You're not." and I didn't hear back from him. Psychos. nothing like already knowing the answer for surprising results when you're "looking at the evidence".)